As most of us in this department know and think about often, there is a famous statement from Marc: “Can we play and explore with a sense of childlike curiosity and wonder?” Yes! We can! There was a moment at the very very very beginning of this process, before we even started looking at the parables together. Where we had a big parachute and were raising it up and down and going under it to do some team building exercises. There was a lot of joy in the room and I just really felt myself being so curious like a child. I felt the sense of imagination and freedom that I probably have not felt since I really was a child. I felt that feeling and tried my best to carry it with me and use it throughout the rest of the process.
Very early on in this process I had a conversation with Rob about feeling childlike joy and immediately I knew that this was going to be something that I needed to dig deeper on. A lot of this show feels like when you are in elementary school and your friends are playing a game and you really want to join but don’t know how to ask so you just keep trying saying “ME ME ME!!” until they let you play.. For example, in those first few scenes (tax payer, king) someone just jumps in and says “I want to be the king!!” and we go along with it and play and react. Moments like these feel like when you are having playtime at school and your friends are playing house in the play kitchen and you just really want to get in there and bake cupcakes for your barbies on the other side of the room. That feeling of wanting something so bad and figuring out how you are going to get it, how can you get in on the game and understand.
This helped me a lot when trying to find the physicality for each moment. Because this work is so devised and we did so much improv and playing around to see what would stick it is our duty to make sure the audience knows exactly what we are trying to do and convey within the story and a lot of that relies on our body language to tell the story. When I was a kid, I did not know how to convey to my mom that I had a headache or stomachache so I said things like “my head feels angry” or when you are hungry you might say “my belly wants a cookie” and this affects the way that you are looking at who you are speaking to.
You might look like this…
Or this…
If I were to look at these images without text I would know exactly what was going on and that is what I will try to do when I am onstage.
In Acting 2 we did a lot of character work that had to do with taking memory from our own life and applying it to an action or a moment in the script. I found that throughout this process the combination of finding pockets of childlike curiosity and relating action to memory helped me to make bold choices, be free on stage, and feel the feelings so that the audience can feel them too.
Below you will find my breakdown of moments in the text, how I was curious, and the memory I associated with the action.
Memory
Prepare Ye: Your teacher tells you it is time to line up and go to recess. You are thrilled to go out and play. This is the moment you have been waiting for all day your body is bursting with radiance and you can’t let the energy explode until you are outside.
Meeting friends after Save the People: It is my first day at Starlight Studios Dance Company (where I danced as a child). Am I cool enough to be here? I have never seen any of these faces before and I want to know everyone’s names. I desperately want them to like me. Smiling and waving at people who are going to impact me.
Bracelet giving: My teacher gives me a silly band for paying attention. I will guard it with my life. This is a token to pay attention forevermore. Am I capable of doing so? What are the repercussions of me not paying attention or falling behind? Is this a lot of pressure? I am very excited!
A la Lin Manuel-Miranda: Pure anticipation. My friend in elementary school tells me she made a dance. Now I get to watch. Wide eyed. What is going to happen?
Altar Gift: My little brother Jake has gotten on my nerves my whole life…yet he is my favorite person on this planet. When we were kids I told him he was “the most stupidest brother ever” my mom made me march back in his room and apologize I was not happy but I did it. At the end of the day I love him and making up is for the better. I was annoyed though.
There Once was a king: It is time for my teacher to tell a very suspenseful story.
Day By Day: Who is this Jesus guy? Can I trust him? He is saying things that sound nice and would make me happy. HUGEEEE MOMENT OF CURIOSITY. Inspecting him with a lot of wonder.
Family Feud: I am in my 8th grade English class with Mrs. Chapman. We are about to play Kahoot based upon our reading of The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. I AM GOING TO WIN. I know this story like the back of my hand. Pure competition and joy. Do I believe in the answer that I give or do I just know it?
Hand Puppets: My cousin Brooke Ann and I are playing barbies. Could also translate to more preschool teacher related activities. And he passed on the other side I am telling my preschool class this story, conveying to them that it is not good that this man is passing on the other side.
Oh Regannnn: Are we being mean to him? I think that I am joking? Is that everyone’s intention?
Love fest: When you make a new friend on the playground and you immediately decide that is your best friend forever.
Marie: I am at recess pretending to be a queen. My peers are my subjects. It is awesome.
Doordash: My phone goes off super loud getting caught digging through my mom’s makeup bag at age 5. Why did I also feel compelled to order food? Will Jesus actually be angry with me? Do I care?
Post Doordash: Being put in timeout for digging through my mom’s makeup bag at age 5. Have I been caught? Why does it matter? Again, do I care?
Be Attitudes: PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME!!!! When the prize for answering a question in the 4th grade was double bubble bubble gum I was the first person with my hand up. I want to impress those in authority. Why do I want Jesus to like me? Is it because he loves everyone else? Does he already love me and see me as a friend?
Middle of All for the Best: I am performing in a dance recital. Thinking about the old pageant trick of putting vaseline on my teeth.
Sowing seeds: We are playing a game at recess that I do NOT want to play. It’s tag and I hate running. Why am I on the footpath? Why can’t I grow tall? Why is Judas always picking on me?
Middle of All Good Gifts: This is the moment where I feel that Jesus loves me for the first time. This is the beginning of me really starting to be on his team. I have doubts later but this is a big moment for me. This feels like the first time you read a novel in English class and really understand it. Things resonate and you get it.
Prodigal son: I feel included in the “cool” group in my class. I am having so much fun! I get to dance and sing because I am happy.
Learn your Lessons well Reprise: The older kids are doing their dance at my dance recital. I feel a sense of community and proudness wash over me. I am proud of these people that I look up to and learn from, I also want to be them but not in a jealous way.
Turn Back celebration: It is field day in elementary school. My friend just got first place in the football throwing competition. This is a BIG deal.
Pharisees of Oz: This is a moment that felt like playing pretend on the playground to me. Why are we acting like this? Did we make Jesus mad? Can we fix this?
Good servant: My clip staying on the green part of the stoplight in elementary school.
Bad Servant: The first (and only) time I was told to walk laps at recess because I was misbehaving. This is a moment where my head might feel angry.
Drinking with Ciarra: Pure joy and freedom with movement.
Jaws and Horror film: Seeing a kid in my class be punished for acting up and knowing that it was going to happen all along but not being able to do anything. Why did Ciarra go through with doing this? Were we being mean to her?
Stone her: The guilty feeling of doing something wrong and living with that secret. You really do just want someone to save you. Jesus does this for me.
Sheep and goats: Someone has saved me, I am free and can find joy again. I am one with this community.
One of you will betray me: The shock of having to accept troubling news for the first time. Will it be me? Did I know all along that it was going to be Judas? Do I hate Judas? How do I feel? How does Judas feel?
Communion: A somber moment. A moment of peace. A moment to reflect. A moment to listen. Because we just learned very interesting information.
Handing back the bracelets: The work is just beginning. There is a graduation feel at this moment. We have built a community and we will uphold his values.
Judas returns: I am sad but I feel fulfilled in a way. I can’t stop looking at Judas, I want to shift my focus to Jesus. This might be the last time that I ever see him.
Prepare Ye the Way: The feeling of being proud of work. The feeling of “we can do this despite literally everything.”
Some articles that I found interesting when thinking about the childlike play within acting
Below is a quote from the article “15 Powerful Childlike Qualities to Regain” that I thought spoke to our process in a very profound way.
“As I looked at my stuffed animals and pondered my age I questioned if having them was childish. At first I thought it was and felt small. But then I paused, taking note of what emotions the “childish” toys stirred in me – childlike feelings that are good.
I remembered how Jesus told his disciples they needed to become like children. What did he mean? They needed to regain some qualities they had lost. Qualities Jesus considered important and powerful.”
A passage from a book gifted to Rob from Marc that really inspired me when thinking about playing and exploring and childlike curiosity
